Getting Youth To Show Up

I have heard many youth ministers talk about the efforts they make to put on regular awesome events within their parish and then being extremely disappointed because they can never get youth to show up. I have pondered this frustration for the past few days and came up with a few things.

The biggest thing that has come to me when thinking about this is simply the idea that youth do not come to events held by you because you are not as important to them as someone or something else might be. Or, you are not around when people are “making plans.” So this question is really more about how do you win their hearts? How we get them to consider what is happening at the Church before they say yes to anything else. Let’s face it, youth do not plan ahead. If you are having a movie night on a Friday night, it is unlikely that you will get any real honest and true commitments from hardly anyone even if you see them all on Wednesday night. Unless, the event is the fruit of your relationship with them.

Say What?

Think about it. The events that you hold should be the fruit of the relationships that you have with the youth. That means that the relationship must come first. It is an absolute turn off when you decide “Hey I should have a movie night because I haven’t had one like that for awhile.” It becomes something you are doing because of your job, if not in your own eyes, then at least in the eyes of the youth. To the youth, you are promoting an event that didn’t start with them. It started with your job. You are reaching out to everyone, not them. Now what if you were hanging out with a few youth having ice cream one day and one of them said “we should have a movie night!” All of a sudden, they are the one’s hanging up the flyers, inviting their friends, and you end up not ordering enough pizza. Wouldn’t that be awesome?

Three Quick Tips To Help You With Attendance At Your Events

Sending a message on Facebook that points youth to an event online and saying “this event is going to be awesome, be sure to invite all of your friends” is tacky. Stop it.

Everyone can see it and the one person who does follow through will feel dorky because they are the only one who investing back into you. Put the event on there, but let the youth take ownership of it. If they are not doing it themselves, then you missed a step.

Call some of the upperclassmen up and ask them to help you with jobs that you created simply to have them there.

Events like this are a great time to grab those people who you do not normally get a chance to connect with. Have one of them be the one who has to pop the popcorn and pour the drinks. Then while all of the kids are watching a movie, have an intentional conversation with your “helper.” Buy some snacks that are really good (I like the Reeses’ Ice Cream bars) and sneak them only to your helpers to show you like them more

Call People

Trust me, they are more scared of you than you are of them. I once called a girl in my youth group trying to get a small group of youth to go to a movie together. It was unplanned and I just wanted to try something random. I started by asking her if she had any plans for the night. Her response was that “everyone else was doing stuff and she wasn’t invited.” I made a deal with her. If I could get 4 others to go to a movie that evening, she had to join us. I ended up calling 10 youth and 8 of them also were going to sit at home on a Friday night by themselves because they were not “invited” by the others.

Stop making excuses, get on the phone, be passionate about the event, and get them there. Bribe them with ice cream if you have to.

That’s Not All

Last but not least, the event has to be memorable. The movie you choose does not matter. Be random, have intentional conversations, and do something that the youth will be telling their friends about on Monday. Mark Yaconelli said it best when he said something to the effect of “You are not a good youth worker unless a rule has been made because of your ministry.” The example he uses is the rule “There shall be no hide and seek in the pipes of the organ.”

Keep up the great work!

CREDITS: CC Image courtesy of ashleigh290 on Flickr

guest

Interresting. The article was an easy read with some valid points and comments on the success of an event being seriously impacted by the direct imput and planning of youth. I agree that one of the best ways to get them involved is to have …them own the event…be the instigators so to speak. The intro sets the article up as a great platform to educate and inform those working with youth…but then falls flat. The personal invite is always best, and with that I am in agreement. However, that combined with social media also works. To simply say don’t use Facebook, it’s tacky is an over simplified statement that doesn’t make full use of the way youth are communicating today. I would agree that a FB post, Tweet, or text as a stand alone way to promote an event is lacking. So combine it with the personal invite.I had some problems with the section: Call some of the upperclassmen up and ask them to help you with jobs that you created simply to have them there. It states: “Events like this are a great time to grab those people who you do not normally get a chance to connect with. Have one of them be the one who has to pop the popcorn and pour the drinks. Then while all of the kids are watching a movie, have an intentional conversation with your “helper.” Buy some snacks that are really good (I like the Reeses’ Ice Cream bars) and sneak them only to your helpers to show you like them more (smilie inserted).” I find this somewhat disturbing as a parent and as a former mental health counselor. I do not have issue with some of the older youth members taking some leadership, but for the director to set up a structure ( in a quiet, sneaky way) that draws a definite distinction between members of the group sets up a favoritism structure that will be picked up on easily by the other youth. There are other subtle conclusions from a counseling standpoint that can also be looked at in regards to this article, but I think it’s best to close now.

http://cymhub.com Eric Gallagher

Thank you for insight. I agree with many of your points. I just thought I would hit on your last one though. I do not think that it sets up a favoritism. Christ discipled in this similar way. He sought out found his disciples, the ones He knew were ready to follow him and He did give them more attention that the others. In fact, throughout scripture it was even clear that He was investing in just a few of them, even further having an extremely intentional and “favored” relationship with Peter. I agree with you that this can cause some other youth to become jealous or desire the same relationship, but it is up to the program to ensure that when the youth desire to go deeper and trust the adults with more of themselves, that the programs (adults) are ready for that.

Emily

There has been a rule added because of my ministry… No jumping from the fire escape to the roof of the adjacent building while playing humans vs. zombies. I had to add the rule myself, but I appreciated the creativity. Getting the kid off the roof was another story.

http://cymhub.com Eric Gallagher

@ac4204ec634351db18e1a08d74fe9e0c:disqus – That’s awesome! Thanks for sharing!

karen

Eric, I am the high school religious ed teacher in Hill City. We are having a hard time getting the kids to feel like they are a part of our chuirch. We do have an “older” parish with some “older” ideas. Any help or ideas would be appreciated! I grew up in Sioux Falls and went to O’Gorman!

Prepared Catholic

Catholic Youth Ministry Resources

Getting Youth To Show Up

Say What?

Three Quick Tips To Help You With Attendance At Your Events

That’s Not All

Eric Gallagher